A Duck Walks into a Windsor Chair Shop….

Everyone who has taken a Windsor chairmaking course here knows that humor is a major part of The Windsor Institute’s culture.  While we take chairmaking very seriously, there’s no reason we can’t have a lot of fun doing it.  My favorite part of  The Windsor Chronicles was our humor feature named “A Duck Walks into a Chair Shop….”  The sub head read “The Best of Chairmaker Humor.” The point was that the best chairmaker humor was lame, worn out jokes retold  with a chairmaking theme.  The column was named after the old favorite below.

A duck walks into a chair shop and asks the Windsor chairmaker, “Got any Shaker chairs?”

The chairmaker explains, “This is a Windsor chair shop.  we don’t make Shaker chairs.” The duck leaves.

The next day the duck walks into the chair shop and asks, “Got any Shaker chairs?

The chairmaker is somewhat annoyed and firmly replies, “This a Windsor chair shop.  We don’t make Shaker chairs.”  The duck leaves.

The next day, the duck walks into the chair shop and asks, “Got any Shaker chairs?”

The Windsor chairmaker is furious.  He screams at the duck, “I told you this is a Windsor chair shop.  We don’t make Shaker chairs.  If you come in here again I’m gonna nail your feet to the floor!”  The duck leaves.

The next day the duck walks into the chair shop and asks, “Got any nails?”

The chairmaker feins offense.  He pushes out his chest imperiously and haughtily replies,   “This is a Windsor chair shop.  We don’t use nails.”

“Good,” says the duck.  “Got any Shaker chairs?”

The following incident is funnier today than it was a couple of days ago. My wife Sue asked me to pull out the invasive plants that had taken root in the rhododendron and holly bushes in front of the house.  They were mostly choke cherries and other weed trees.  However, after I uprooted one of the larger,  I looked at the hairy stalk and realized I had just made a major blunder.  It was poison ivy.  As I sit here, my legs and arms are covered with blisters.  They have stopped running, by remember the line from the old song, “You’re gonna need an ocean of calamine lotion.” I’m glad I wasn’t bare chested, or wearing a Speedo. I think my arms and legs will be pretty well cleaned up before the class next Monday.