The Windsor Chronicles Blog

The April 26 NYC bow back class is in session this week. This is a required class for knighthood. As usual, there are several knightings as chairmakers complete the first step in membership in the Royal Orders. Sirs Fred Dudak, John Sims, and Ken Kimber were knighted on Wednesday afternoon.   They are numbers 158 - 160.

NYC bow back is also the companion side chair for the sack back. A lot of chairmakers choose this as their second class so they complete a set of Windsors – two sacks with four to eight NYCs. For that reason, we had one of the largest Raisings in quite a while.  Six chairmakers were transformed from Entered Apprentices to Master Chairmakers. Now, they too possess the secret hand shake and the secret distress call. They can greet other Masters and are always protected, wherever they go in the world.

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Some chairmakers have gotten good publicity recently. His Grace Ralph Quick and his wife Caron, and Sir Fred Chellis and his wife Dame Priscilla were all selected for the list 200 Best Craftsmen by Early American Life magazine. His Grace Ralph and Caron also got a nice write up in their home town paper the Clarksville (MO) Monthly. His Grace makes me look handsome.  Have you seen those Capital One credit card ads with the Viking barbarians? Then you have seen Ralph. Somehow His Grace managed to convince a tall, gorgeous blond to marry him. His Grace usually makes sure that any photos that  accompany publicity show Caron. She was looking particularly nice in the Clarksville Monthly photo.

No matter what rules we make for ourselves, we can’t resist exceptions, usually to our detriment.  His Grace did  relent from his rule recently and posed for a newspaper article featuring his chair shop. Ralph, remember what Alice said when in Wonderland. “I give myself very good advice but very seldom follow it.”  From now on, let Caron pose.

His Grace wrote us this. “Just wanted to send you a copy of a photo of me showing a young boy how we make our chairs at our shop. The newspaper photo is not that good. As a matter of fact, it makes me look like I am as bald as one of the Bald Eagles here. Ha! Ha!

We had the Governor and his wife come to Clarksville over the weekend to view the Eagles, since Clarksville is known as the Eagle Capitol of the Country. While they were here, our mayor mentioned to the governor that there is a Windsor chairmaker in town. The governor’s wife is a real history buff, and is especially interested by anything to do with Daniel Boone and his time. She insisted on stopping in to see our shop and she was thrilled to find us in costume. We always dress in our colonial clothes when there are tours or events such as Eagle Days. 

  The Governor’s wife REALLY liked the Writing Arm chair and we are pretty sure she will be placing an order for one. Our Mayor, who was escorting them around town, heard her tell the Governor that she wants to have one of them in the Governor’s Mansion. So, they did take our information and such.

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Sir Ken Neiswender exchanged some emails with us that you will find interesting. This is the first. “On the update front, my church is having a mission marketplace on this Saturday where local small business set up tables, sell their wares , and donate a portion of their proceeds to the Methodist Committee on Relief.  I was asked if I’d donate a chair for a silent auction and agreed.  They chose a sack back that I carved knuckles on for the auction.  They are two church members who are talking about buying a chair from me and are looking at the auction one.  I guess there are plenty of organizations that would like free chairs, but the idea of selling a few as a result of a good cause appeals to me. We’ll see what happens.”

This is Sir Ken’s follow up. “The event raised over $1,000 for Haiti Relief, I don’t know how much of that was from the chair. You might recall when I was at C-arm class that I did a wonderful job reaming my leg holes.  They were the most perfect ever done by a student.  Dead on angles, absolute perfection except for one minor detail.  The angles were reversed.  I’ve sat in that chair at our family table for about four years, and it is the one that the auction person selected for the auction. Every time I sat in it, I thought that this is a nice chair.  If only I hadn’t screwed up the front leg angles, I would really like it.  So guess it’s good that chair went to somebody else and is helping a good cause.  Plus now I get the pleasure of making a new chair, maybe one that won’t mock me at dinner.”

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Luke Cabanel and Sir Bob Longstreet landed a great commission.  They made a group of reproduction furniture for the Betsy Ross House in Philadelphia.  The two also got a nice bit of publicity out of the commission when the Philadelphia Inquirer did an article about their work. Luke was also filmed by a local television station. The segment will be 15 minutes long and will air in the fall.  Fifteen minutes on television is a very long time.  

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            It happened.  We kicked off our 2010 school year with the Tete a Tete class. You may be wondering what that is. If you own a copy of Make a Windsor Chair, I included a picture. Tete a tete is French and it means head to head. The middle e in tete should have a circumflex, while the a has an accent grave. I would have used the accents, but I don’t know how on an English keyboard.

             You mostly likely have seen a tete at tete. It is a double chair, like a settee, only the sitters face different directions. I dreamed up a Windsor version that I made using the c-arm.  I think the piece was attractive and I really liked the way the S-shaped double arm is reflected in the seat platform.

            After I published Make a Chair lots of other guys made a tete a tete. I am amused that the idea even made its way to China.  Those miniature doll-sized Windsors you see in Americana shops are made in China. The Chinese factory that makes them also makes a sack back tete a tete.

            A Windsor tete a tete is a fantasy chair, the froth of my fevered brain. It is also an anachronism, in that the two never existed together in time. Think of it being like those movies where dinosaurs chase caveman, or George Washington reads maps before the Battle of  Trenton by the light of a kerosene lamp.    The C-arm dates to the 1790s, while the tete a tete is a Victorian form from the mid-19^th century. Thus, half a century separates the two. 

            This class was the first ever that was 100% Royal Orders – not a commoner among them. Also, there were no ceremonies, which meant there was no cake. That seemed inappropriate to H. G. Troy Beall. Since H. G. Lyndon Gallagher was here from Montreal, H. G. Troy decided to initiate a new celebration on his own initiative. He went to the pastry counter at the local market and bought a cake that celebrated “Canada Week.”  The cake decorator should travel more. She spelled the name of our northern neighbor Canida. Anyway, the cake was great, and the decorator did provide us with a lot of laughs.

            By the way,  H. G. Lyndon kicked off Canada Week by bringing each of his fellow Royal Orders members a pair of 2010 Olympics mittens. Apparently these mittens were so popular with the people attending the games in Vancouver that the Olympic Committee ran out them.  H. G. Lyndon had already bought so many pairs we suspect he had cornered the market, creating an artificial shortage.  I understand why the mittens were in such demand.  They are fleece lined, and very warm. Every picture taken during the week has H. G. Lyndon’s hands in it, wearing a pair of the red mittens with a white maple leaf on the open palms.

            While there were no Royal Orders celebrations, the class did celebrate the event that opens our school year. We drilled the first hole.  The backboard with all our signatures and the photo of the event hang on the wall between a window and the white board. It will be the first board into the fire when we close the year with the official Burning of the Backboards ceremony.

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            The winter 2010 issue of the magazine Maine Bar Journal included a four-page interview with Bill Clifford. Bill is an attorney from Lewiston and has taken numerous courses at The Institute. The interview included five color photos of Bill and his work. A full page portrait of him in his workshop preceded the text. We did learn something new from the article.

Bill’s nickname is Bim. Remember that if you’re ever on a bench with him. “Hey Bim, how ya been?”  Coincidently, Bim’s college roommate practices here in Hampton and they get together whenever Bim is in town.

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            You may be wondering how I made out with my winter projects. I did get the tete a tete prototype completed. I finished the article I was writing, but the editor and I will shoot the pix for it and another article when he is here in May.  I wrote 30,000 words of my next manuscript. It is a long story, but I did not undertake the book of meditations and dogs. Instead, I began the book about living with and caring for our friend Jim. June is my target for finishing the first draft. I’ll keep you posted.

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I have just begun reading an obscure second hand book I picked up. Its title is Country Chairs of Central Pennsylvania by Marie Purnell Musser. (I read stuff like this all the time.) The books  is a large format paperback published in 1990 by an 85 year-old local historian. In the Introduction Marie describes how she traveled all over Centre, Union, Snyder, Mifflin, and Juniata counties seeking out decorated, plank bottomed country chairs. She also sought out chairmaker descendants and interviewed them about their ancestors.

I am not far into the book. In fact, I only read the Introduction. However, I was so impressed by something she wrote I stopped to ponder it. I am going to quote her, but first I have to set up the story. If you have taken a sack back class with us, you have heard my discussion of the Four Objectives. These are the objectives we all want to accomplish whenever we set out to make a piece of furniture.

The fourth objective is to make a piece that elicites a favorable response from the people who look at it.  It is a natural desire on our part to want people to like and appreciate what we have made. I note that the large number of 18^th century chairs still extant proves that the chairs we make will outlast us. In my discussion these leads me to  point out something else that makes us feel warm and fuzzy.  It is the thought of a great-great grand daughter showing someone our chairs and saying, “Those were made by my great-great grandfather.  He was an amazing craftsman.”

Now you know how Marie Musser’s experience fits into our experiences as chairmakers. This is what impressed me and made stop reading to write to you. She wrote, “During these forays for information, I met and came to know many fascinating people whose pride in their ancestors’ work remains undaunted by time.”

Keep making chairs, not only for people alive now, but for generations yet unborn.  Who knows, a future Marie Musser may  track down your descendants to gather information about you.

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It’s over. The 2009 class year ended pretty much as anticipated and as described in an earlier post.  We graduated everyone and then, burned backboards. After the class left, Don, Fred, and I cleaned the shop. The only difference is that we did not set up for the next class. We’ll do that the week before March 22. We had a cold Canadian craft beer, shook hands, wished each other a Merry Christmas (we’re not a politically correct bunch) and went home. We’ll surely see each other during the break, but we don’t have any plans.

I have three months without a class. Before you congratulate me on a long vacation, I assure you I have lots scheduled. I will be doing a lot of writing. I have some more magazine articles scheduled with Popular Woodworking. We will shoot the photos for those articles; plus the big one I told you about, that is now in the can. I also have plans for future postings here. I will be doing a lot of this writing from home. So, if you need to contact me, email is best.

I have another book underway. I hope to complete it, or get very close to finishing it during the break. It is a book of mediations; something I find myself doing a lot more of as I age. Everyone who has studied here knows we have two dogs we love – Angus and Menlo. If you have been taking classes for a long time, you have met our other dogs, who now rest in the well-maintained dog cemetery overlooking the stream that runs by the house.

I have always interacted with our dogs. I snuggle them; I talk to them; and I take them with me wherever I go. I have found that if my dogs don’t like someone, there is usually a good reason. I have learned that generally the people I don’t warm up to don’t like dogs.  

Above all, I watch our dogs. I study them as they go about their daily lives. I watch them play. I watch them do what they consider their work – their jobs. In watching them, our dogs have taught me a lot, or reconfirmed many of the principals that guide my life. Dogs are generally happy and content, and because I am in many ways like them, I too am a happy and content man.  It took me many decades to achieve peace with myself and with life, but I did. I did it by doing a lot of things dogs do instinctively. It is amazing that they avoid many of the problems that afflict humans. Thus the subject of this book which I title Turn the Other Jowl: What Dogs have Taught me about God.

If I complete this book, I expect to move right on to the next one. This one is comparable to Tuesdays with Morrie. In Tuesdays the author, Mitch Albom visited his friend Morrie as he died of Lou Gehrig’s disease. Through their conversations the author learned many important lessons about the meaning of life and the things that truly matter. My book – with the working title Everyday with Jim will be from the point of view of the caregiver who lives with a “Morrie,” day in, day out. From that proximity and point of view, the caregiver learns even deeper life lessons.

In my book, the role of Morrie is our friend Jim who has been rendered a bedridden invalid by MS. I am the caregiver, who in caring for him has learned how little really matters in this life, and that the little that does matter really matters a lot.

I won’t get this far during the break, but book five in my Young Adult fantasy adventure series is all outlined. I do expect to begin it before 2010 is done. Meanwhile, my search for a literary agent goes on.

During the break, I will complete the tete-a-tete (head-to-head in French) that has been on my bench for the last several classes. It will be the prototype for our first class of the year. I may even get some work done on a prototype of our 2011 new chair class. Right now, that one is a secret. But you’re gonna love it.

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Running a business in this economic climate requires lots of planning.  When times were fat, we maintained a well stocked catalog building. While we liked it that way, we can’t afford it now. The result is that I look ahead to what we will need for upcoming classes and I order what I need plus a bit more.  The order covers the class; the bit more takes care of sales to the people in the class.  Anything left over goes on a shelf for sale through the on-line catalog.

               As you can see from this description, I am left with small amounts of lots of things. Once that small amount sells out, I do not stock it again until I am running that class again. So, while running a business in this climate requires me to do a lot of planning, it requires the same of you.   The days are gone (although I hope they will return) when you could send an order from the web site for 8 turning sets and have them arrive in a couple of days. Now, you need to check with us as soon as the idea on making more chairs enters your mind.  If you wait until you are ready to start the project, you may be disappointed. In other words, for both our sakes give me as much advance notice as you can.

               We will wrap up 2009 tomorrow, and will not teach the first class of 2010 until March 22. I am not planning on stocking any more inventory until early March. 

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The weak economy has a lot of people concluding they can’t afford to take a class, so they decide to try their hand at chairmaking on their own.  As a result, we have been getting a steady stream of orders for tools and material from people who have never studied with us. I have to inform them that many of our products are part of our program. We developed them for our program so we could teach our classes and provide our students with the wherewithal to make more chairs. We do not sell these items to the general public. As you can see from above, we have trouble keeping the people who have been here supplied. I cannot short change them in favor of someone who is not willing to invest the time or effort to come here. 

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This is the season for gift certificates. If you want to buy someone a class, we can provide you with a gift certificate to put under the tree. You can get a certificate for a specific class date, or one that is open ended and can be used when the recipient is ready. The best way to do it is to use our catalog order form. It will allow you to send us your CC# encrypted.  Be sure to include the information needed to personalize the certificate in the memo section. That information includes the recipient’s name; the names of the gift givers, the event (Christmas, birthday, anniversary, etc.)  If you want the certificate to be a secret and have it sent to another address, be sure to make that clear, and to give me that address. 

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Last post I mentioned Sir Brian Offutt, who his here this week. Sir Brian gave me some other news in regards to his chairmaking. He displayed a settee at two community fairs this summer and was awarded first place and best of show at both fairs; the Shippensburg Fair, Shippensburg, Pennsylvania and the South Mountain Fair in Adams County, Pennsylvania. He is planning to take other chairs to these fairs next summer.  

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I know Windsor chairmakers can’t do math, but this joke allows us to poke fun at our arch rivals the vile and treacherous Shaker chairmakers from Shakermaker U. 

“His Grace Don Harper was passing by a Shaker chair shop as the Shakers were loading a large order of chairs on a wagon. The shakers were busy counting the chairs to make sure they had the proper amount. Hezekiah tried first, but got lost track after 17. Ezekiel tried next, buy lost count at 14. Jonas did not get any higher than nine. 

His Grace looked at the assembled chairs and told the Shakers there were 65. The Shakers were amazed. “How did you manage to do that?” Hezekiah asked. 

“Easy,” Don replied.  “I just counted the legs and divided by four.”

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We are teaching the 2 Kids Chairs class this week.  In this class each student makes a child’s sack back and a matching youth chair for use at the table. I have written before about the joint we worked out to attach the footrest. I am proud of it and the way it snaps together and self locks.  I don’t know of any other place in woodworking where this technique is used. It is unique and only known here.

This class is also our last of the year and wraps up 2009. We end our school year with a ceremony we call the Burning of the Backboards. It occurs late Friday afternoon after graduation when we all gather at the incinerator behind the shop and burn the year’s backboards. Those who have studied with us know that we always ask them to take the time to sign a backboard so they are with us symbolically at this ceremony. The first backboard into the fire will be the one signed by the members of the first class of the year.  It has been hanging on the wall all these months, awaiting its moment of glory.

We have an additional ceremony that will take place just before the Burning. Sir Brian Offutt will be inducted into the Alpha Omega Society.  This is accomplished by attending both the first and last class of the year. It doesn’t happen often. In fact, only nine times previously and the last induction was in 2004. Brian will be given a certificate and a pewter mug with the Greek letters Alpha Omega, his name, and the year engraved on it.

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Recently I mentioned the First Knights. Within days I heard from all of them for different reasons.  Lord Lyndon Gallagher was here for the balloon back. Sir Stig Brandvik is here this week for the 2 kids chairs. And Sieur Vincent Lavarenne emailed me with some of his news.

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Our sandpaper sharpening method, as described a while ago in Popular Woodworking is going international. Sieur Vincent Lavarenne, Premier Chevalier de France, is writing an article about our method in a French woodworking magazine Le Bouver, which means Grooving Plane.  Sieur Vincent has been demonstrating and promoting the method to his woodworking association and through his efforts he attracted the magazine’s attention.

He says he met some resistance to the method from French woodworkers. He converted them with a clever demonstration. He destroyed the cutting edge of a carving tool by chiseling some limestone. Then, in 47 seconds he restored the edge  using our sandpaper method. The 47 included time to clean up and put away his sharpening set up.

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We heard from Lord Lyndon Gallagher, who was here for the Balloon backs two weeks ago. He reports he donated a sack chair to the local Firemen’s Auction for the needy.  The chair fetched $700.  By the way, Lord Lyndon brought us some great Canadian beer that Fred, Don, and I will enjoy after the Burning. We always ask Canadian students to bring us some craft beer from their area. They make great beer, and we aren’t likely to ever stumble across these small local brands down here.

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I joined the 21st century this weekend when started a Facebook page. I’m in the process of building it. Fortunately, I have a talented computer consultant to walk me though the process – my 17 year old son. Otherwise, I’d be lost. I am not sure how I am going to use the page. I’m thinking of keeping this one for my personal use– to stay in touch with my extensive family (I am one of nine kids) and close friends.  Currently, I plan on setting up another for The Institute. If you want to join as a friend of The Institute, that will probably be the place, rather than my personal page. Meanwhile, be patient with me while I sort all this out.

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            File this one under “Why I Love My Job.” The November 16 Balloon Backs chair class is in session this week. In this class everyone makes two balloon back Windsors, an early 19^th century variation on the bow back side chair. Kelly Rothermel is attending the class with her father, His Grace Kurt, Duke of Windsor. Kelly took sack back with her father back in 2007. Since then, she has graduated from college, taken a job teaching in the same parochial grammar school she attended as a girl, and has gotten engaged.

            Kelly plans on marrying her fiancé a year from now. At the Catholic wedding Mass the bride and groom sit on chairs on the ambo, near the altar. Kelly is making the chairs she and her husband-to-be will sit in at their wedding. I get a kick out of imagining Kelly’s decedents cherishing the chairs their ancestor sat in when she was married.  I won’t be around to see, but I bet they fight over who inherits them.

            H.G. Kurt is also making two balloon backs. He plans on giving those to Kelly so that the new bride will start off married life with a set of four chairs around her table. As my wife Susanna says all the time, here at The Windsor Institute, we make memories. There will be many memories attached to those chairs being made here this week.

            We have so many members of the Royal Orders here this week, Kelly will be all alone when she is raised to Master Chairmaker. We are earling Sirs Albert Filo and Lyndon Gallagher this week. Fortunately, our earls have their wives with them. Otherwise, Kelly and Ken Kimber will be the only members of the Assembled Multitude.

          At his earling  Sir Lyndon becomes far more than Lord Lyndon. His elevation to earldom places him in command of all Canadian Knights. Until now, Sir Jean-Francois Theoret, The First Knight of Canada has been in command. Royal Orders regulations pass command to the highest ranking member from a country. Sirs Stig Brandvik and Vincent Lavarenne are the First Knights of Norway and France. Meanwhile, an Australian chairmaker is one class away from Knighthood and First Knight status. These guys underscore why I am never understanding when someone says, “I love to take a chair class, but I’m from Iowa and its such a long way to New Hampshire.”

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            We have had a flurry of newspaper articles about Institute alumni pass over our desk recently. When we tell our students how to go about getting this sort of free publicity we always assure them that they will not end upon page 19 below the fold. Instead, they will be featured prominently, often on a front page.  The guys mentioned below prove that point.

            The above mentioned Lord Lyndon was featured in the Hudson, Quebec Gazette. The article was written to promote the sixth annual Tour des Ateliers de Hudson et de la Region (Tour of Workshops in Hudson and the Region.) A rocking chair by Lord Lyndon was featured in the tour’s brochure and his compass plane and spokeshave graced the cover.

            The front page had a tease with a color photo of Lord Lyndon with a local gallery owner sitting in a group of his chairs. The article about Lord Lyndon and his chairmaking took up an entire page.

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            Roger Engle’s home in Hudson, Ohio and his chairmaking were featured on the front page of the Akron Beacon Journal’s Home section.  The article took up the entire page and had three full color pictures. The text took up a third of the jump page as well. The article promoted the annual Hudson Heritage Society’s Holiday House tour.

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            An article about George Mathews’ chairmaking business took up two-thrids of the front page of the Winston-Salem Journal’s Living section. It is accompanied by five color photos of George working, of his chairs, and of his tools. The text takes up more than half the jump page along with two more color pictures of George.

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            Sir Paul Thomas’ chairmaking business was promoted on the front page of the Buffalo Business First. The article was accompanied by two color pictures of Sir Paul working and another of him standing next to a Nantucket fan back.

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 The November 2 settee class is underway as I write this posting. The students are mounting their arm rails.

 Boy, do I have egg all over my face. Those of you who have made this chair know that when we lay out the seat for saddling we run the compass all the way around the complete shape. This is different than for other chairs. In the rear, this line lays out the groove.  Across the front, it describes the round ridge that runs along the front. 

Fred made the seat on Monday. Tuesday, I was doing the drilling and reaming demo. I showed the class how to lay out all the sight lines and I spent a bit of extra time explaining the placement for the center pair of legs. I showed why they looked so recessed relative to the outer pairs and cautioned the students not to get confused.  I laid out the sight lines for the outer pairs of legs on the tropics. Then, I showed how the lines connecting the outer pairs locate the central pair on the equator.  

I clamped the seat on the bench top so I was standing behind it. I reminded the class that with any other chair this is an anathema, as it puts us out of the chairmaker’s position. With a settee it is necessary to work from behind, but we have to be conscious of our placement in order to avoid confusion.

The students learned the lessons I was teaching.  However, I learned a lesson too. While teaching and talking it is even more important to remain aware in order to avoid confusion. Instead of the required front/center leg placement, I set my bit on the intersection of the compass line and the equator. You know that I should have used the line connecting  the outer front legs. I had completed all three front leg holes and was getting ready to turn the seat to drill the rear leg holes when Sir Dan Santos observed that holes did not lie in a straight line.

Boy, was I embarrassed! The only  thing I can add to alleviate my embarrassment is that although in the hole was in the wrong place, it was a perfect 10 degrees. I did joke with the class that I had meant to add the extra hole. Since Love Seat is a common name for a six leg settee, my plan was to turn a decorative post for the hole and attach  a disk top. Its purpose would be to act as a small tray to hold two champagne flutes for the lovers using the settee  They didn’t buy my story.

Earlier in the week we did give the class a treat. A settee seat is too long to cut easily on a band saw. So, we usually cut the round ends with a scroll saw. After planing my seat blank and showing how to do the layout, I got a bright idea. I took down one of our  26 inch bow saws and cut the seat by hand. I will admit that I have not done that for a while. However, using a bow saw is like riding a bicycle. In short order I was following that pencil line as fast as I could cut on a band saw, and faster than a scroll saw.   

I explained how to use the saw to the class (it’s not intuitive) and had the students cut out their seats that way. For most of them, it is the only time they will ever use this very effective tool.  I think I will do the same with the tete-a-tete class in March.

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The long wait is over and it was worth it. We finally have our new and improved reamer in stock.  It is a sweet tool that cuts with almost surgical precision. I used it for the first time to leg up the staff settee.  I set my cordless on slow and with the chuck just barely turning I cut a tightly curled shaving from the just the right spot to adjust the leg a half of a degree. The reamer has so much control it did the job without making a complete revolution.

The pilot on this reamer has a longer tapered on its business end, which makes it easier to slide into the hole. The pilot has a boss on the other end that fits into a recess in the small end of the reamer. This way, there is no movement on the screw. We also reduced the reamer’s small end to less than 3/8 inch. That makes it easier to start in a 7/16 inch reamed hole in the arm.  It also lets us use the reamer for kids chairs, which have a 3/8 inch hole in the arm. We plan on offering a set of pilots that will allow the reamer to be used with precision in holes bigger and smaller than 9/16.

Our reamer is part of our program and we cannot sell them to anyone who has not studied here.

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To celebrate the new reamer, I have added the chairmaker joke below.

A monk walks into The Windsor Institute.  Mike, Fred, and Don and 14 students were busy roughing out chair seats with adzes. The chips were really flying.  During a lull, the monk introduced himself to Mike as the abbot of the order of Little Brothers of Perpetual Poverty, which had a monastery nearby.

“What do you do with all the waste chips and shavings?” the abbot asked.

“We take them out back to the incinerator,” Mike explained. “we pile them up and burn them every couple of days.”

“Then I have a proposal for you,” the abbot offered.  ”If you’ll allow us, every day at quitting time I’ll send over a couple of novices to sweep the floor and collect all the waste chips.  They will take the chips back to the monastery, and we’ll burn them for heat.  We can no longer afford heating oil.”

Being a kind-hearted and magnanimous man, Mike agreed to a trial period. (Being a canny Yankee he  also like the idea of free labor.) The arrangement soon proved to be beneficial to both parties, and as a result The Windsor Institute began to rely heavily on the work of the chip monks.

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We are getting close to the end of our 2009 school year. In fact, we only have two classes left before our winter break.  I point this out as these classes are a minor change from the schedule on the web site. November 16, we begin the Balloon backs chair class. I have two spaces left. November 30 we run the Two Kids chairs class. I can take a couple of more in this class as well. We are not running either class in 2010.

Mid-summer we dropped the writing arm class.  So, Two Kids will be the last class of the year and those students will participate in the Burning of the Backboards.  

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We just wrapped up three classes in four weeks. I was pretty busy during that stretch and just couldn’t take time to sit down and write. However, I do have a nice story to tell. Sir Ron Tatman just returned from a year serving a year in Iraq. He returned so recently he still has sand in his ears.   As soon as he got back he emailed to ask if he could decompress by helping out at The Institute. I told him we would be delighted to have him work with us to teach the October 5 sack back.  Sir Ron has taken sack back with each of his daughters.  So, I knew he was capable and would be a big help.

Sir Ron spent the week with us while his wife Jill studied. Jill is working on her Master’s degree in nursing.  We have enough faith in Sir Ron’s abilities that we invited him to teach a demo.  He did  the final assembly in legging up our class chair; drilling the leg holes and wedging.  Ron loved the experience so, we had him mount the arm rail as well. We did the joinery, while Sir Ron again did the final assembly and wedging.

Friday, when it came time to mount the bow, I realized that if we had Sir Ron do the final assembly in this last stage, he would have put together the entire chair.  That’s what we did. Fred drilled the bow holes in the arm. Don shaped the bow ends and fitted them. I drilled the holes. Ron put on the bow.  

Before graduation I took the chair out to the bending area and wrote a message on the bottom of the seat expressing the staff’s gratitude to Ron for his help with the class and for his service to our country. One at a time Fred and Don snuck out to sign the chair as well. At graduation we gave the chair to Sir Ron.  He got a little misty eyed.

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It’s been a while we since I posted a good chairmaker joke.  This one is courtesy of Ron Davis.  

His Grace Don Harper is a retired physics teacher and a pretty bright guy. He was driving home one night after a long day of teaching at The Windsor Institute.  The weather was warm, so His Grace had driven his Model A to work. As he putt-putted through town he got the idea to stop at the 401 Tavern. This new establishment  bought out Widow Fletcher’s last winter and His Grace had heard that the new owners had expanded the menu. He was also curious as to whether the 401 would continue to serve the best martini in town. After all, Mike Dunbar had given his secret martini recipe to Widow Fletcher’s and in gratitude the restaurant had named the drink the “Windsor Chair.”

His Grace was pleased to discover that the new establishment had retained Widow’s distinctive interior. He sat at the bar expecting his old friend Lenny the bartender to greet him. He was surprised when a robot bartender came over and asked if it could take his order.  Doubting the robot’s abilities His Grace specified, “A Bombay martini, straight up, three olives, please. Neither stirred nor shaken, but swirled.” He sipped the colorless, but flavor filled liquid. He savored the fragrant taste of juniper berry. He let it linger on his tongue and relished how the flavor was punctuated by the slight saltiness contributed by three crisp queen-sized olives. He though to himself, this martini is as good as, if not a bit better than Mike Dunbar could make.

The robot struck up a conversation. “So, what’s your IQ?” it asked Don.

His Grace was surprised by the question and so answered honestly, “On hundred and sixty-seven.” The robot paused a moment while a row of small red and yellow lights flashed randomly.  The robot then began a long and enjoyable conversation with Don about String Theory, quarks, and cold fusion. When they were done Don left. On the way home he reflected on how good the martini had been and how much he had enjoyed the conversation. However, he was curious why the robot asked him his IQ.

Driving through the center of Hampton the next night, His Grace decided to see if that martini had been a fluke. Was it possible that robot could make another as good as the first? “A Bombay martini, straight up, three olives, please. Neither stirred nor shaken, but swirled,” Don requested. Yes, oh yes. It was just like yesterday’s. 

Just like yesterday the robot began the conversation by asking “So, what’s your IQ?”

This time Don decided to try an experiment. “One hundred and thirty eight,” he answered. Small red and yellow lights flashed. Don decided the robot was changing its programming. The robot then began a long and enjoyable conversation about the stock market, politics, and Faulkner novels.

The third evening Don stopped by the 401 yet again. As he had done the two previous nights he ordered, “A Bombay martini, straight up, three olives, please. Neither stirred nor shaken, but swirled.”

After allowing Don to taste the martini the robot asked. “So, what’s your IQ?”

Don decided to continue experimenting with the robot’s programming. “One hundred and one,” he answered. Lights flashed randomly once again. Then, the robot began a lively conversation about football, NASCAR, and Miss April in the recent Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue. The two gave each other lots of high fives and knuckle bumps.

The next night Don went into the tavern for another martini. “A Bombay martini, straight up, three olives, please. Neither stirred nor shaken, but swirled,” he instructed the robot.

After Don took his first sip the robot again asked, “So, what’s your IQ?”

“Sixty-seven,” Don answered with a sly smile, curious to see how the robot would respond.

Once again the small lights flashed rapidly on and off. Then, the robot asked, “So, how long have you been a Shaker chairmaker?”

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            You know the words from that old John Denver song, “Some days are diamonds, some days are stones. Sometimes the hard times won’t leave me alone.” I’ve had my share of stones and hard times, but Monday this week was a gem. We were like the ants in the ants and cricket fable. We were getting ready for winter and part of our preparation was to hold our last splitting party of the year.

            I buy our logs at a local concentration yard. I begin the process by calling up the manager to make sure he has a good supply of red oak logs on hand. If he is not going to be present when I visit, he will arrange selection of logs for me to choose from. He places the logs all parallel, with one end raised on a junk log. That way I can walk around the logs and see under them as well. Being able to see whole logs makes choosing them a lot less risky.

            I felt like a kid in a toy store. I wanted all the logs. There wasn’t a bad one in the lot. However, I only needed a limited amount: enough to get use through the last classes of the year; enough to put aside for sales; and enough to provide for the first class of 2010. I chose the best, but hated to leave others behind.  The quality was that high.

            This Monday, when it came time to split the logs, the joy continued. We cut the first bolt to six feet. There are good reasons why. The November 2 class is a settee.  Each student needs two six foot blanks; one for the arm and one for the bow. The second class that month is the Balloon backs. In this class, each student makes two chairs and needs two six foot pieces. The first class of 2010 is the Tete-a-Tete, and you guessed it – each student will need two six foot pieces.  That is why we started with a six footer; to make sure we had all we needed. If the log contained any unpleasant surprises, we could still cut six foot bolts off the others. 

            The log opened hard; a lot harder than I expected from such a straight piece. This always makes me worry, as a large encased knot or other blemish could be holding it together. It took a lot of wedges and a lot of hammering, but we won. The log was perfect and a beautiful thing to behold. The grain was as straight as an arrow. Only a group of chairmakers would understand why we paused and spent ten minutes admiring the sight. (Okay. Don, Fred, and I are old. While we really were admiring the log, we were also catching our breath after swinging that eight pound maul for 15 minutes.)

            The other logs opened just as straight and clean as the first. Even their hearts were straight. This is unusual, as the heart represents the tree as a sapling, and few saplings are perfect. We usually cleave off the heart and throw it into the firewood pile.  Not this time. Most of it was good enough for bending stock.

            It took about 90 minutes to rive all the logs and split of the butts into firewood. By 10:30 we were ready to cut bending stock on our band resaw. Fred and Kevin usually do this work and they got right to it. Meanwhile, Don and I set to another task. There was a lot of 4 foot stuff left over from our spring splitting party. We decided to make it into arms and bows to put aside for winter catalog sales.  We need to keep these parts in inventory as we sell a lot of pre-bent arm and bows pairs to chairmakers who do not have the capability to bend their own wood.

            The left over stock we worked  was the dregs. Setting up a class, we go through the stock and choose the best pieces.  When someone orders bending stock, we again select the best pieces. By the time we get around to the next bending party, the old stock has been pretty well picked over and only dubious wood remains.  

            To stay out of Fred’s way, Don and I pulled the planer out into the parking lot and went to work. Monday was a beautiful fall day.  The air was dry and the sun was warm. I suggested that Don pitch (pass the wood through the planer) and I would catch (pass the pieces back to him.)  I felt pretty self satisfied with my cleverness.   Don had to do all the thinking as to how the pieces should be placed to pass through the machine. All I did was stand facing the sun, enjoying its light and warmth while I daydreamed.

            As we worked we had the steamer running. We paused from time to time to bend a batch of parts. Nothing beats a good bending day and this one was perfect. There was not a cloud in the sky. The air was warm and dry.  When we make up parts from the dregs we expect a high failure rate. After all, it is lesser quality stock. Monday afternoon, Don and I bent 33 pieces.  Not a single one broke. We had a small delam in one arm and in one bow.  Both will be easily fixed and will end up in sack back chairs. Three arms rolled up slightly, but will be perfect after drying in a vise for a week.  Like I said at the beginning, some days are diamonds.

            The wood was not only of questionable quality; it was also five months old. We had left it standing in a corner all that time and it was completely air dried. Our success bending it puts the lie to the old chestnut about needing to keep the wood wet. It should be a lesson to the guys who wrap their wood in plastic, or store it under water. A good bending day is far more important than moisture content. 

            A day this perfect could only end one way, with a perfect beer. We each had a bottle from a selection Glenn Carter had brought us from a micro brewery near him up in Toronto. You know, those Canadians are as good at making beer as Don and I are at bending.

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